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John

Member

Joined: 2019-01-11

Posts: 2,011

How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

This week they wrote back to thank me and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

There can be only one.

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John

Member

Joined: 2019-01-11

Posts: 2,011

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

Please Let Me Know How You Eat Your're M&Ms In The Comment Section Below

Thank You Have Nice Day

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Harmonious

Formerly jkdrip

Joined: 2015-07-27

Posts: 644

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

*Your
Sorry but title triggers me

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Currently playing through: Mega Man 1-6

Listen to my in-game music! (it's pretty much all I'm good at)

TundrumMax

Formerly Memomemo

Joined: 2017-10-26

Posts: 447

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

I eat mine normally...

by doing trickshots with them

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I can speak by breathing in but it sounds like a dying horse

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John

Member

Joined: 2019-01-11

Posts: 2,011

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

*Your
Sorry but title triggers me

I Noticed That You Deleted Your Post Instead Of Editing It, Why Did You Do That?

I eat mine normally...

by doing trickshots with them

That Is Very Cool Please Elaborate Further

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Harmonious

Formerly jkdrip

Joined: 2015-07-27

Posts: 644

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

*Your
Sorry but title triggers me

I Noticed That You Deleted Your Post Instead Of Editing It, Why Did You Do That?

I read the title again and thought you fixed it
Then I realized I misread it

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Currently playing through: Mega Man 1-6

Listen to my in-game music! (it's pretty much all I'm good at)

John

Member

Joined: 2019-01-11

Posts: 2,011

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

*Your
Sorry but title triggers me

I Noticed That You Deleted Your Post Instead Of Editing It, Why Did You Do That?

I read the title again and thought you fixed it
Then I realized I misread it

Oh Ok Thanks For Explaining...
Now Can You Share How You Eat Your M&M's?

Please Explain With Vivid Details

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TundrumMax

Formerly Memomemo

Joined: 2017-10-26

Posts: 447

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

I eat mine normally...

by doing trickshots with them

That Is Very Cool Please Elaborate Further

I bounce them off things and they land in my mouth, sometimes I do other things

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I can speak by breathing in but it sounds like a dying horse

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Abelysk

Guest

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

Please Let Me Know How You Eat Your're M&Ms In The Comment Section Below

Thank You Have Nice Day

I'm an M&M cuz i'm white on the outside and pure on the inside.

Bimps

Member

Joined: 2015-02-08

Posts: 5,067

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

the owner of ee, everyone

John

Member

Joined: 2019-01-11

Posts: 2,011

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

http://everybodyedits.com/help

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Bimps

Member

Joined: 2015-02-08

Posts: 5,067

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

http://everybodyedits.com/help

what

Master1

Member

From: Crait

Joined: 2015-02-15

Posts: 4,452

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

this topic makes me MUD

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mutantdevle

Moderation Team

From: Hell

Joined: 2015-03-31

Posts: 3,848

Website

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

Emalton, did you get demodded and this thread is you having a break down over it?

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Joeyc

Guest

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

What if you don't want M&MS, but instead twix

Harmonious

Formerly jkdrip

Joined: 2015-07-27

Posts: 644

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

I eat M&Ms in a style akin to a wolf digging into meat
Fix title pls

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Currently playing through: Mega Man 1-6

Listen to my in-game music! (it's pretty much all I'm good at)

hummerz5

Member

From: wait I'm not a secret mod huh

Joined: 2015-08-10

Posts: 5,853

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

I was not expecting a ****post but I got a ****post.

moving to off-topic

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thanks HG, HG, HG, HG! anatoly, zumza! zoey!

John

Member

Joined: 2019-01-11

Posts: 2,011

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

This Is Not A **** Post I Am Actually Curious

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Joeyc

Guest

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

Emma333

Member

From: The Netherlands

Joined: 2015-04-16

Posts: 589

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

I eat 1 half of an m&m and throw the other half away

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Pm me with anything math related please

N1KF

Wiki Mod

From: ဪဪဪဪဪ From: ဪဪဪဪဪ From: ဪဪဪဪဪ

Joined: 2015-02-15

Posts: 11,114

Website

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

I Eat MNMS With My Teeth

Luka504

Member

From: Serbia,probs never heard of it

Joined: 2015-02-19

Posts: 2,934

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

This joke was made 10 YEARS ago.
https://www.craigslist.org/about/best/t … g=en&cc=us
It's just a copy pasted version nothing is even different.

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How long will it take me to get banned again?
Place your bets right here.

Bimps

Member

Joined: 2015-02-08

Posts: 5,067

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

This joke was made 10 YEARS ago.
https://www.craigslist.org/about/best/t … g=en&cc=us
It's just a copy pasted version nothing is even different.

wow thanks

John

Member

Joined: 2019-01-11

Posts: 2,011

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

why do you think i put a link to where i found it lkua

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Luka504

Member

From: Serbia,probs never heard of it

Joined: 2015-02-19

Posts: 2,934

Re: How Do You Eat Your're M&Ms?

why do you think i put a link to where i found it lkua

You did a good job of hiding it Notlame.

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How long will it take me to get banned again?
Place your bets right here.