Do you think I could just leave this part blank and it'd be okay? We're just going to replace the whole thing with a header image anyway, right?
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OKI GUYS EVERYONE MAK DA SUPR FANFRICTION I WILL MAK 2 HAHAHAHHAAA
SLASHBOLD PINGOHITS FINDS LIBERAL ARTS MAJOR DEAD ON WET PAVEMENT SLASHBOLD
----
'WHY ARE YOU SO DEAD: SAY THE PINGOHITS
"WHY WHAT" SAY MAJOR
"DONT TALK BACK TO THE TEACHER BAD MAN" SAY THE PINGOHITS AS HE RUN AWAY INTO TRAIN RIDE TO BRAZIL
---
SLASHBOLD PINGOHIT GOES FOR JOURNEY INTO BRAZILIAN MALL TO FIND MRS HOE SLASHBOLD
---
OKI IMA HERE NOW WHAT DO I DO, SAY THE PINGOHITS TO HIMSELF
"FIND YOUR LIFE THROUGH PASTAFARIANISM" SAY THE STRANGE MAN AT STREET CORNER
"HOW TO FIND ME PASTA" SAY MARIO
"GO AWAY PEDOPHILE" SAY THE STRANGE MAN
"OKAY" SAY THE MARIO
NOW PINGOHIT IS VERY LOST HERER IN BRAZIL IS NO MALL JUST OLD PEOPLE AND SOME BEGGAR
SO HE DECIDE TO ASK OLD PEOPLE
"HELLO HOW YOU DOING CAN YOU PLEASE KINDLY DIRECT ME TO PLAZA" SAY THE PINGOHITS
"taco" SAYS OLD GUY
"LEARN ENGLISH YOU BORDER JUMPER" SAY THE PINGOHITS AS HE STEALS OLD MAN CAR
"no tak care, please!" SAY OLD MAN WITH DEEP, DEEP PENETRATING SORROW, "i stoled it from somebody, already!"
"STOP TALKING LIKE MEXICAN AND GO TO SCHOOL" PINGOHIT SHOUUT
"HEY BE NICE", SAY THE DIFFERENT FIDDY FIE, A MAN WITH POTENTIAL TO INGEST GRENADE
"NO U" SHOUT PINGOHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
"STOP OR I WILL BAN YOU FOR USING ALL CAPS AND SEXUAL THING IN THIS STORI"
"OK"
AND THEN THE PINGOHITS RAN TO THE AWAY USING GOOGLE TRANSLATE TO TYPE HIS ENGLISH BETTER
---
PINGOHIT FIND THE BIG BIG MALL, BY DR. SEUSS
---
THERE ONCE WAS A NICE LITTLE PINGOHITS
HE HAD A BIG BRAIN OF CHEESEY WITS
HE FOUND BRAZIL MALL
HE WENT THROUGH THE HALL
AND DISCOVERED REIDOLOL WAS BIT
"WHAT THE HELL HAPPEN REIDOLOL" SAY PINGOHITS
"I DONT KNOW FDOOU WENT TO THE BIG CRAZY IN HIS TINY BRAIN AND BIT MY PHALANGES"
"REIDOLOL FDOOU CANT USE BIG WORDS LIKE THAT"
"FDOOU BIT MY FINGER"
"HOW MANY"
"ELEVEN"
"ok I WILL AVENGE YOU"
"THANK"
SO PINGOHIT WANDER THROUGH MALL AND DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO EXCEPT FIND FDOOU
BUT HE FOUND BIMPS INSTEAD
"HEY BIMPS"
"/ignored" SAY THE BIMPS BACK WITH FEMALE TONE
"NOT NICE I WILL /GODON YOU FOREVER AND YOU WILL NEVER WALK WITH YOUR INVISIBLE PROSTETHIC LEG AGAIN"
"i hate u so very much" SAY THE BIMPS BACK WITH FEMALE TONE
"KTHXBAI" SAY THE GKA
"WHOA GKA WHERE YOU COME FROM" SAY PINGOHITS
"I JUST GOT BACK FROM IRAQ MANN" SAY GKA "IT WAS SO FUN BECAUSE I GET TO TRY THE FALAFEL VERY FIRST TIME IN MY ENTIRE FIRST LIFE"
":COOL: :COOL:" SAY PINGOHITS
AND PINGOHITS LEFT TO FIND FDOOU AND THE REST OF HIS FRIENDS
---
PINGOHITS MEETS FDOOU BEATING MEAT
---
"WOW FDOOU I NEVER KNEW YOU WERE A BUTCHER"
"TY PINGOHITS I REALLY LIKE SAUSAGES"
"COOL"
"WANT TO HAVE PORKCHOP"
"SURE"
"No fair!," shouted BuzzerBee with correct grammar, "Just because I'm vegetarian doesn't mean I get to miss out!"
"HERE HAVE LEAF"
"This is an acorn."
"DONT CARE EAT"
"No."
FDOOU WAS GETTING BIG MAD, "THE RULES IN EE SAY YOU CANNOT CYBERBULLY AND YOU ARE A CYBERBULLY I WILL CALL MICROSOFT AND YOU WILL HAVE NO MORE ENERGIES LEFT TO SPEND"
"I highly doubt you will be able to call Microsoft with the motor skills you currently adhere."
FDOOU WAS GETTING SO MAD HE EVOLVED INTO...
TREEJOE4!!!!!!!!1111!!!11!!1ELEVENTYONE!!!11
"hey guys"
"NO ONE LIKES YOU" SHOUTS ANCH159 BEHIND A BOX OF HALAL PORK
TREEJOE4 WAS GETTING SO MAD HE EVOLVED INTO...
TREEJEW4!!!!!!11!!11!
"why is there pork on the counter are you being racist WHY ARE YOU BEING RACIST"
TREEJEW4 WAS GETTING SO MAD HE EVOLVED INTO...
IPWNER!!!
"sdiohsdfogbsdfijgbsoigbaihgadbhgkadfgaeirug"
"I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE" SHOUTS FDOOU AS HE RAN OUT THE DOOR, KILLING TWO MEN IN HIS ESCAPE ROUTE
"TSK TSK TSK TSKT STKSKTKSKFGHIAUDGHSDIUHT" SHOUTS ANCH159 AS HE FLINGS HIMSELF INTO SPACE VIA PASSENGER PIGEON
"I don't like this place. I'm going on Quora," says Buzzerbee, frowning at the scene with dismay. He logs off.
"dfhgsodihdoubOHIESHOSNJGNDFSOGSDFNHJKSDFHDSF" SAYS THE IPWNER
"WHAT BOY? YOU HAVE A CAT IN YOUR THROAT"
"FDIGHSIDFUHSDIUFHB"
"OK ILL GET CHAINSAW
"SFOGHSDFOUBGHSDF"
"AND RAT POISONING"
"OUISHSDFIUGSDFIGDFSBNGJDSGBSDFKBGSDBJGJSDFGSDKBJ"
"AND PROTECTION FROM BANS OK I WILL ET4 YOU MY DEAR DEER"
"IFDGJ"
AND PINGOHIT WENT TO GET LE SUPPLIES
---
PINGOHITS JOURNEY BACK TO THE HISPANIC MALL
---
"TOO MUCH WEED" SHOUTS PINGOHITS OVER THE GROUP OF ESTONIAN CRACKHEADS
he left
---
PINGOHITS JOURNEY BACK TO FDOOU BUTCHER SHOP
---
"IPWNER THE MALL LOOKS TOO MUCH LIKE NEW YORK I DO NOT LIKE"
"TIS OKAYAY MY FRIENDOLICIOUS!!! =3 I CAN WAIT 5EVER AND 5EVER!!!!!"
"ok"
---
PINGOHITS JOURNEY TO CHINA"
---
"OH NO ITS CHAIRMAN MAO!" SHOUTS PINGOHITS
"no its me muffin you dumb plebian" says muffin
"WAIT MUFFIN OR MUFTWIN
"both"
"OH OKAY"
"what are you doing in china"
"I NEED RAT POISON AND CHAINSAW"
"that only exists in korea"
"OH OK"
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DIFFERENT55 APPEARED WITH A HORRIBLE MESSAGE!
"this is eeforums, not failforums. Pingohits, I'm banning you."
"OH NOOO! D55 THIS IS SATIRE! IM MAKING FUN OF ALL THE FANFIC GARBAGE THAT APPEARED OVER THE WEEKS!"
"<insert d55's message here (different55, if you read this, put your own message! It'll help greatly to the story >"
AND DIFFERENT FLEW AWAY ON HIS COMPUTING DEVICE
"so yeah i guess you can catch a ride on the silk road" SAY THE MUFFIN
"WHAT FLAVOUR ARE YOU" SAY THE PINGOHITS
"blueberrry"
"OK BYE HAVE FUN WITH CHAIRMAN MAO
"racist"
---
PINGOHITS GOES TO SOUTH KOREA
---
wait wrong
---
PINGOHITS GOES TO MONGOLIA
---
did you even go to school
---
<end> MORE COMING
CHARACTERS INTO THIS STORY
-pingohits
-Different55
-reidolol
-bimps1002
-fdoou
-gka
-buzzerbee
-treejoe4
-treejew4
-ipwner
-anch159
-muffin
-zoey
-awzome
SOON TO BE VIOLENTLY IMPLEMENTED
-imgood9
-minimania
-pyromaniac
-nou
-toop
-theeditor
-pingohit
-pongohits
-pingohots
...awaiting more requests...
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the first time i appear i disappear rip
no worries you arrive when ipwner gets the supplies
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its the only good story
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VERY SUBLIMINOUZZZZZZ =3 RITE MOAR NAO MAO! RIGHT LAO! LAO!!!!!!!!!!! CHOP CHOP MY LITTLE POT OF 3DAY OLD TEA~
ssAARASAAAAAAAAA iAAAAAAAAAAAAA OU yaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAA YAAAaa YAAaah; yaayaayaa, yayayaya-ya-ya YAAA YAAAYA; YAYAYA YAAHAYAhAAAAAAAAAA
EPIOOOOOUUUUUUuuuuuu IUO0O0oooooooooooppi
;3 0>o ~X_x~ <~(^V^)~> (); ;B ;~; *~<:',',',',',{ Q=(*@`)Q
Im A ®a®ity ®
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Ty all FO so many great good comments
Be sure to donate moneys for Africa and subscribe for more minecraft
/sarcasm
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I have wasted 10 minutes of my life.
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I have wasted 10 minutes of my life.
reported
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BUMPITY BUMPKINS NEWFANGLED GADGET ADDED
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who is awzome
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awzome is duck's less superior twin
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UPDATE: rearranged new chapters and all, this is CHAPTER 2
---
PINGOHITS GOES TO NORTH KOREA FINALLY
---
"HEY LOOK IS THE SUPER COOL GANGNAM MAN"
"i am one and only supreme leader guards apprehend this man"
"IM ASIAN TOO"
"you dont look korean"
"DONT WE ALL"
slight hesitation noises
GUARDS DONT APPREHEND THE MAN
IM USING HIM AS MY BRAIN SUBJECT BECAUSE ALL THE OTHER NORTH KOREANS ARE MENTALLY CHALLENGED AND MALNUTRITION
"THANK GOD" SAY PINGOHITS
"HEY! YOY!" SAY FDOOU
"oh no" said pingohits
"oh no" said the guard
"oh no" said the guard
"oh pls no" say the supreme gangnam
"YOUR STORY IS NOT FUNNY AND YOU SHOULD CARE BECAUSE I AM FDOOU"
and fdoou was shot twice and nobody ever cared
"OK YOUNG MAN OFF YOU GO TO MY TEMPLE"
---
PINGOHITS JOURNEY TO THE KREMLIN WHILE LOOKING FOR IPWNERS SUPPLIES
---
"HEY LOOK MOMI IS AMERICAN"
"DONT LOOK DONT lOOK DONT LOOK HIM IN THE EYE
"OK"
AND SO PINGOHITS TRAVEL DOWN THE HOTEL BOULEVARDOS INTO BIG BIG KREMLIN WHERE HE MET NOSFERATU AND ZOEY2070
"NOS" SAY NOSFERATU
"PATRIARCHY PATRIARCHY" SAY THE ZOEY
"SOHFDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDSOHFSDOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" SAY THE AWZOME
"KILL THEM ALL" SAY MR GANGNAM
AND THREE BODIES AND FOUR SOULS WANDER INTO THE HEAVENS LATER TO BE SHOT DOWN BY ISRAELI MISSILES
"OK" SAY GAY GANGNAM "IM FEEL TOO HAPPY SO LETSA GO TO A RUSSIA BAR AND GET DRUNK ON ALCOHOLOIC WATERS"
"OK" SAY THE PINGOHITS BECAUSE HE IS NOT CATHOLIC
---
PINGOHITS MEETS HIS 3 TWINS
---
AND SO THE GANG WALKED INTO THE BAR AND SAW PEOPLE DOING ADULTERY IN THE BEDROOM AND ADULT DOING PEOPLE IN THE BEDROOM
"WAY TOO MANY CRAYONS" SAY GANGNAM
"I AGREE" SAY THE PINGOHITS
"AND ME" SAY PINGOHIT, PINGOHOTS, PONGOHITS
"HOLY BOB" SAY PINGOHITS
"STOP STEALING LINE" SAY SASSAY D55
"WHY DO I HAVE THE CLONES OF ME" PINGOHITS SAID
"WE ARE TWINS NOT CLONES YA MOM HAD BIG UTERUS"
"HOW DO YOU KNOW MY MOM MOLESTORS"
"WE ARE BORN IN THE SAME WOMB"
"AH SO YOU ARE MOLESTOR FROM BIRTH"
"I DONT LIKE U IM GOING"
Pingohit exited ROOM #1
Pongohits exited ROOM #1
"IMA GO NOW" SAY PINGOHOTS
"NOTSO FAST YOUNG MAN" SAID GUARDS ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT, AND TEN
"IM PEEING MY ORGANS OUT MANN" SAY GUARD NINE
"OH NO I BETTER LOG OFF" SAY PINGOHOTS
"2LATE4U"
"NOO"
"WE WILL USE U AS INDENTURED SLAVE"
"I DONT EVEN NEED MONEY
"2BAD4U"
"IF YOU SAY THAT ONE MORE TIME I WILL MURDER YOUR FAMILY"
"HAHA I HAVE NO FAMILY IM NORTH KOREAN 3BAD5U"
"A"
---
PINGOHITS AND PINGOHOTS GET HORRIBLY DRUNK IN IMMIGRANT BAR
---
WE COME FROM A LAND OF ICE AND SNOW
WHERE THE MIDNIGHT SUN AND THE HOT SPRINGS BLOW
"DUN DUNDUDDNDSDKFJSDFHSDKFJHSAKF-"
"IM TRIPPIN BALLS MAN"
GANGNAM WAS LYING IN CORNER SINGING ROSIE SONG AND EVERYONE ELSE WAS GATHERED IN CENTER OF BAR TRYING TO SMOKE HOOKAH WITH NOSTRILS
"GUARD ONE AND THREE ARE DEAD GUYS"
"JUST CHECKED, GUARD SEVENS PULSE, HES GONE"
"GUARDS TWO, FIVE, AND NINE, AND TEN ARE SLEEPING OUTSIDE **** THEMSELVES RAW" SAY GUARD FOUR
SO FAR GUARD FOUR, SIX, AND EIGHT ARE ACTUALLY ALIVE BECAUSE THEY ARE ALLERGIC TO ALCOHOL AND CANNOT DRINK OR ELSE THEYLL LOOK LIKE ELMO DOPPLEGANGER
"OK GUYS IMA SMOKE COCAINE WEED NOW"
"GOGO PINGOHOTS GOGO PINGOHOTS"
"U GUYS MAKE IT SOND LIKE IMA STRIPPER NO STOP NOW"
"YUMMY"
"STOP"
"JUST SMOKE DANK MAN
AND SO PINGOHOTS MAK VERY VERY BAD IDEA AND SMOKE THE JOINT AND KILLS HIMSELF BY ACCIDENTALLY SWALLOWING HIS ADAMS APPLE
"HEY WTF MY APPLE U JERK" SAYS ADAM
"KILL"
and adam was shot to the ground camp style
"HALLO MY PEOPLES I PLAY BEAUTIFIL INSTRUMENTS IN EXCHANGE FOR NESTING DOLLS OKI"
"HOLY NAPTIME ITS PYROMANIAC WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE"
"HE*"
"( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)"
"GAY"
AND SO PYROMANIAC GOT TO CENTER OF DANK WEED JOINT CHIEF OF STAFFS AND STARTED PLAYING EPIC NOTES
(DANUBE HAILSTORM, PERFORMED BY SEXY PYROMANIAC THE BRAINIAC)
"BUM BUM BUM BUM BUM"
"PSSH"
"BUM BUM BUM BUM BEM BEM BUM BUM BUMUMUMUMUM"
"PSSH"
"BUM BUM BUM BEM BEM BEM BUM BUM BUMUMUMUMUM"
"PSSH"
"BUMUMUMMUMUMUMUUMMUMUMUMUMUUMUUMUM-"
AND GANGNAM INTERRUPTED LIKE CALCULATOR, "KILL"
"oh no" said THE PYRO
AND HE WAS SHOT TWICE IN LUNGS AND FIVE TIMES IN THROAT AND FIVE TIMES IN VOICEBOX WHERE HE BLEED PROFUSEDLY UNTIL HE HAD NO MORE BLOOD LEFT IN HIS TWO BODIES
---
SUPER AWESOME HALLUCINATION MONTAAAGGGEEEE
---
Pingohits: THERES...THERES A LARGE ZEBRA NEAR THE TELESCOPE
Guard 4: OOHHH....OH I SEE IT BOY....ITS VERY LARGE...INTEREST....POINT OF THE-
Guard 6: NO DONT TOUCH IT NOW
Guard 8: LSD LSD LSD LSD WAIT GUYS
Guard 6: THE HELL YOU WANT
Guard 8: LUCY IN THE SKY WITH DIAMONDS GUYSS
Guard 4: WHAT
Pingohits: HE MEANS LSD MEANS LUCY IN THR SKY WITH DIAMDODGSNHFGHOJ
Guard 6: TALK NORMALFLHTJSDFI
Guard 8: I DONT LIKE U PPL OOOHHHHH THE ZEBRA ITS GETTING CLOSERR THE EYES ARE LIKE INFERNO
Guard 4: IM LIT BOII
Guard 6: UR ASIAN NOT NEGRO STOP IT
Guard 4: OK
Pingohits: I THINK WE SHOULD GO TO THE KREMLIN NOW GUYS I HAVE TO GET IPWNER THE STUFFS
Guard 6: BRUH WE LIT AS HAIL
Guard4: UR ASIAN NOT NEGRO STOP IT
Guard 6: IM BLACK WHAT ARE YOU COLORBLIND
Guard 4: IF I WAS COLORBLIND THEN EVERYONE WOULD BE BLACK
Guard 8: HOW DOES THAT EVEN WORK YOU ARE HIGH AF RIGHT NOW
Guard 6: MY MOM TOLD ME IF I WAS EVER HIGH I NEEDED TO LIE DOWN AND COUNT TO TEN
Guard 4: OK LETS DO IT GUYS JOIN UP HANDS TO YOUR SIDES CRISS CROSS APPLESAUCE NOW LIE DOWN
Pingohits: WE SHOULD REALLY BE AT KREMLIN NOW GU-
Guard 6: 1...
Guard 8: 2...
Guard 6: 3...
Guard 4: 4...
Guard 8: 9...
Guard 4: W...
Guard 6: 10 OK I FEEL BETTER NOW
Pingohits: TO THE KREMLIN WE GOOOOOOOOOOOOO
---
PINGOHITS AND 3 GUARDS JOURNEY TO LE KREMLIN SITE
---
<will continue~>
CHARACTERS INTO THIS STORY
-pingohits
-Different55
-reidolol
-bimps1002
-fdoou
-gka
-buzzerbee
-treejoe4
-treejew4
-ipwner
-anch159
-muffin
-zoey
-awzome
SOON TO BE VIOLENTLY IMPLEMENTED
-imgood9
-minimania
-pyromaniac
-nou
-toop
-theeditor
-pingohit
-pongohits
-pingohots
...awaiting more requests...
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thinking about continuing this
shall I?
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YES SUPR KOOL AND EPIK ALSO EDD MEH I EM ELSO SUPR KOOL AND EPIK
hello there! please ignore my old signature, it didn't exist
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thinking about continuing this
shall I?
No, make an adventure story like Antonio's, if you want to make an even worse story.
This is a false statement.
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Sexy pyromaniac the brainiac here and i approve.
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this is
why i don't go into the creative forum
the most beautiful thing i have ever read
proc's discorb stylish themes for forums/the game
꧁꧂L O V E & C O R N꧁꧂ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ
danke bluecloud thank u raphe [this section of my sig is dedicated to everything i've loved that's ever died]
?
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"Patriarchy Patriarchy"
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tl;dr
F
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You probably come up with this stuff in like 5 seconds so why not?
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No Zoey x treejoe4 OTP? Screw this I'm out of here.
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