Maturity

hummerz5 · 2017-05-24 14:48:26

Hello. I don't think this is a topic (I googled and read through Debates pages) but do let me know

A topic is addressed occasionally when I play Everybody Edits or float about the various forums/chats/rooms. This topic is maturity, or more often the lack thereof. Or, perhaps the topic isn't addressed, simply realized. The actions of one or another might appear immature. But, is that not to be expected? This game was originally intended for--or perhaps not, but simply ended up being picked up by--children, but we also have had many folk grow with the game and are now old people. (pardon the exaggeration?) This would create the contrast between what we perceive as mature and not.

So I ask, more generally (perhaps outside the game) what you might perceive as "mature" or perhaps "acting like an adult." Are these two things equal? That probably goes without saying. But then, given our forum's somewhat diverse background of locations and understandings, can we find nuances in them?

--

I originally wrote 600 words of philosophy but then decided that was a bit much. I also wanted a Debates topic but since I don't have a specific I want to ask, I guess it goes here. Any thoughts on maturity or age of adulting?

thank

Nebula · 2017-05-24 14:59:16

I would not be maturity forever. I would be peaceful so on.

Onjit, Kirby, Master1

mutantdevle · 2017-05-24 15:57:16

When you're too mature you become boring. In my opinion you need to balance your maturity and immaturity and know when each is appropriate.

LukeM, SirJosh3917, TaskManager, Master1, Slabdrill, Freckleface, Dencc, liammatey

Emma333 · 2017-05-24 17:52:31

I don't think it's really 'acting like an adult' since many adults are irresponsible and unreasonable too. But I see maturity as being able to listen to someone and being reasonable. Some people on ee I just can't communicate with well because they're incredibly annoying in only talking about themselves and not taking other people in consideration.

hummerz5 · 2017-05-24 18:25:28

Whirl wrote:

I would not be maturity forever. I would be peaceful so on.

can you perhaps reword that

Devlin wrote:

When you're too mature you become boring. In my opinion you need to balance your maturity and immaturity and know when each is appropriate.

Here's a thought. I think you're associating maturity with boring immobility and immaturity with some sort of bubbly essence. What if maturity is actually simply the ability to act accordingly in those situations? Of course, we can't just call it by being "boring" -- surely there's more

Emma333 wrote:

I don't think it's really 'acting like an adult' since many adults are irresponsible and unreasonable too. But I see maturity as being able to listen to someone and being reasonable. Some people on ee I just can't communicate with well because they're incredibly annoying in only talking about themselves and not taking other people in consideration.

you raise good points, perhaps "acting like an adult" is a bit of an idiom. When parents say to "act like an adult" they probably weren't referring to the examples you bring up, which proves your point.
being reasonable? agreed. Of course, I imagine someone who is "too reasonable" can reach a point where they're considered immature.

Nebula · 2017-05-24 21:04:01

hummerz5 wrote:

Whirl wrote:
I would not be maturity forever. I would be peaceful so on.
can you perhaps reword that

lol nope enjoy this text

Onjit, Kirby, AlphaJon

Prodigy · 2017-05-24 22:21:13

Most of the people here in the forums are not mature, yet again I speak about the latest post of mysterion and some others. It's so stupid that they give a S*** about people they don't know. This gets on my nerves and this may be the reason why the forums may be dying or EE. Most of the old generation has departed and the immature/not well known people are still here.

The more of those people start to join the forums, maybe more NOT GOOD content is going to get posted. I remember when I felt for everything back in the days but I just started to get less into EE if ya know what I mean. I would screw around at times while others do it all the time which makes looking at post not worth it.

mutantdevle · 2017-05-24 22:45:39

hummerz5 wrote:

Devlin wrote:
When you're too mature you become boring. In my opinion you need to balance your maturity and immaturity and know when each is appropriate.
Here's a thought. I think you're associating maturity with boring immobility and immaturity with some sort of bubbly essence. What if maturity is actually simply the ability to act accordingly in those situations? Of course, we can't just call it by being "boring" -- surely there's more

Boring is a selective word that is unique to each person. Personally, I find anyone who tries to maintain constant professionalism and tries to keep things 'appropriate' to be boring since they do not seem to have a lighter side. For example, I am quite a political person but I find most politicians boring since they try to maintain a professional and mature nature to everything. Likewise, what is considered to be immature or mature is also different to each individual. And there can be good types and bad types of both.

For example;

Immaturity I consider to be good: Most dark humour, general silliness, posting a random (non aggressive and peaceful) joke (which is clearly intended as such) into a semi-serious discussion, brief annoyance, puns and other generally childish behaviour.

Immaturity I consider to be bad: pre-school style jokes (eg. fart / poop / vomit references), dark humour that deliberately intends to offend (eg. telling a rape joke to a rape victim), unwillingness to co-operate (especially when a discussion is more serious) as well as people who take being annoying too far.

Maturity I consider to be bad: Treating everything that ever happens as a serious issue, refusing to deviate from a professional standard (professionalism is good unless it is too constant), telling immature people to grow up (I don't know why it just annoys me), strictly following rules to the point there are no exceptions to the point it becomes unreasonable and only ever acting grown up.

Maturity I consider to be good: Professionalism that still has a lighter side, dealing with sensitive subjects effectively, being reasonable, not making jokes when it really isn't appropriate, a willingness to co-operate, being able to sympathise with others, being able to understand when you have crossed the line yourself and being open minded.

I would consider myself a fairly immature person; I constantly make puns and joke around and generally be slightly annoying (in a fun jokey way). Despite this, I am easily able to snap into a more mature mind set whenever is required. This most commonly occurs when I first engage in conversation with a friend who is going through something. I'd start the conversation with humour but as soon as I realise they are not in the best of moods (either through their body language or them directly saying they are not in the mood for humour) I will immediately ask them about and listen to their problem whilst offering soloutions and help but just generally listening. From my experience, by the time they have finished talking about their issue they are usually already in a better mood and I am able to start integrating humour again which often puts them in a better mood for the rest of the day. This type of humour is never related to the problem they told me and acts more of a distraction from it.

I would also say that in a discussion I can both be very troll like and contribute to said discussion. If I feel that a joke can be made then I will go for it, as long as it is harmless and does not (deliberately) offend people. But I can also debate a point and considers others points of view. One of the main types of immaturity I don't like is petty immaturity. This is often where someone would just flat out deny your argument and completely disregard it; these people tend to know they're wrong but don't like to admit that which is definitely a type of immaturity I dislike encountering.

I will never 'act my age'. I enjoy my childish traits way too much for that. But I do recognise the need to understand and compromise with others, if I'm wrong or I agree with an opposing argument I will say so. When a serious tone is needed I will provide it. But my default is that everything is childlike and humorous to me unless it is clear that more maturity or professionalism is needed.

TLDR: In conclusion, someone who completely lacks any form of maturity or seriousness is a negative type of immature. People who are so mature that they do not express anything else are, what I consider to be, boring. And those of us who have some sort of idea of when we need to be mature vs when we don't need to be are, arguably, more mature than people who don't act in any other way but mature. What is considered as mature is also unique to each person, and as a result many mature people are considered immature and many immature people may be considered mature to others.

(Not sure how well I explained all that, I feel like I probably made too many sub points within what I was saying and hence some things wither either over or under developed. Oh well.

Tomahawk · 2017-05-24 23:27:39

hummerz5 wrote:

This topic is maturity, or more often the lack thereof. Or, perhaps the topic isn't addressed, simply realized.

Wtf? xD

Humvee, you need to collect your thoughts before you post. You reconsider and correct yourself to the extent that your post reads like a conversation between two people. The rambling is at least coherent, but I have no idea of the context in which you're asking, or maybe stating - then again perhaps moreover observing, while simply realising-

pls

Doodle

Pingohits · 2017-05-24 23:54:38

The thoughts and actions of a particular person are, more or less, influenced by their background and upbringing.

The following is the truth: I was brought up by so-called "Offensives" on an absolute waste of coding called "iFunny". This is the place where I learned the terms "****" and "****". This is the place where the Holocaust and 9/11 were grandiose, comical events, and all black people deserved to be lynched.

Of course, I knew these were not true, and so did many other edgy teens. This sort of humor appealed to us. The concept of being "edgy" was the new fad. You're cool if you're edgy. Be proud because you're edgy. At least, that's what we believed in.

I was born in it. Molded by it. And out sprung Pingohits, that **** gay **** ****. I took what I've learned and pushed it over here, to EEForums. They were not ready. Post after post, weak banter after weak banter, I garnered those woots. It empowered me. I thought I was the coolest kid on the block. At least, that's what I believed in.

A period of time came and went, and I found myself listening to psychedelic rock. Then I discovered the wonders of mathematics. Then a particular forumer showed me r/hmmm. I discovered how much of a **** I was, and how abhorrent and outdated "offensives" were. I found myself at a crossroad on an empty plain; continue with those edgy maymays, or show some class and grow up. I chose the latter, and I appreciated my decision afterwards.

But some days I find myself leering towards the other side, glancing here and now. Yet the force of my path compels me to stick to it, and I have. At least, that's what I believe.

Slabdrill, TaskManager

hummerz5 · 2017-05-25 01:49:35

Tomahawk wrote:

Humvee, you need to collect your thoughts before you post. You reconsider and correct yourself to the extent that your post reads like a conversation between two people. The rambling is at least coherent, but I have no idea of the context in which you're asking, or maybe stating - then again perhaps moreover observing, while simply realising-

true, but that's probably not my worst. The part you point out reads like I'm thinking about it at the time, but I would still want to get that idea across. "It is sometimes discussed. But, at the same time, it might also simply be observed." I mean, I suppose I could say "this topic is both observed and discussed" would that be more succinct?

Given all my large posts on the forums, it seems someone has finally opted to try and read my ramblings! You're right, though, my writing style has somewhat devolved into stream-of-consciousness.

Prodigy wrote:

The more of those people start to join the forums, maybe more NOT GOOD content is going to get posted. I remember when I felt for everything back in the days but I just started to get less into EE if ya know what I mean. I would screw around at times while others do it all the time which makes looking at post not worth it.

Agreed, kinda bothers me but such is life..

@Devlin
Plenty of good thoughts. You seem to sum up what I was thinking in my large text so perhaps the ideas were injected anyhow. I'd underscore your point about "maturity" being specific/individual to a person. Though it can be plenty cultural too right? E.g., professionalism or the threshold for getting on someone's nerves could vary based on culture. Thanks for the thoughts

Pingohits wrote:

The thoughts and actions of a particular person are, more or less, influenced by their background and upbringing.

Great segue.

oh ok

thank

Pingohits, mutantdevle

Tomahawk · 2017-05-25 02:42:11

hummerz5 wrote:

You're right, though, my writing style has somewhat devolved into stream-of-consciousness.

Well, every stream has an end and even your thought process should end in a conclusion. I can agree or disagree with a conclusion, and that starts a discussion much more effectively than that which may (or perhaps not ¬.¬) eventually become a conclusion.

While it may be in your name, humming and ha'ing gets a thread nowhere - unless you're going for that particularly life-sapping kind that inspires essay posts like Devlin's (~ ty for the tl;dr).

Admittedly, I lack any enthusiasm for vague discussion, but you could at least narrow the field a little. Ultimately, there's something you want answered; draw some sidelines, put down some goalposts and ask a question that points people towards them.

mutantdevle

hummerz5 · 2017-05-25 12:42:48

Tomahawk wrote:

unless you're going for that particularly life-sapping kind that inspires essay posts like Devlin's

you got me!

Tomahawk wrote:

Admittedly, I lack any enthusiasm for vague discussion, but you could at least narrow the field a little.

well I suppose I was thinking about looking for an "age" but there wouldn't be much good in doing that. But yeah, my only goal was to see some thought, not to have an explicit endpoint.

Tomahawk · 2017-05-25 15:29:24

I think maturity only loosely correlates with age. Adults can act immaturely just as readily as children; as Pingo said, it's certain experiences you have that make you more mature.

That said, I don't expect maturity from young players, but I suppose I shouldn't expect it from any EE players. There shouldn't be any reason to act maturely in a game, so long as you keep to the rules.

In the general case, I don't think maturity can be defined objectively. I suppose it's the ability to behave appropriately in a circumstance that requires some degree of serious thought or considered action. Beyond that, further definition would require specific contexts.

hummerz5

N1KF · 2017-05-26 00:35:19

Different parts of maturity may be easy to objectively define, but maturity as a whole appears to be a result of society telling adults what they should do. Maturity isn't inherently good, but the parts that make it up often are.

hummerz5

Insanity · 2017-05-28 19:25:48

Maturity is how accurately someone is able to define themselves. A child likely has no idea of their purpose in life, and what they're capable of doing. If you asked a 13 year old child to define himself, it's likely less accurate than that same person's definition of their 13 year old self, when they're 20 years old. This is the essence of maturity, being able to recognize the differences in how you perceive yourself as time goes on. People like to say the concept of "being fully mature" exists, but personally I don't think people stop maturing. The only way this would be possible if a person percieved himself the same exact way at the age of 25 versus 75. It's highly unlikely.

Generally maturity improves over time, and the more time that passes in an individual's life, the more they're able to understand about themselves and who they are.

People who are offended easily are immature, and this is fact. The reason being that if you are content with yourself and who you are as a person, there is absolutely no reason you should care, or even worry about anything that someone else says to you. Maturity is largely attributed to growing up and finally turning into the person you're striving to become. Once you've reached that, minor nuisances shouldn't even be in your realm of thought.

Master1, Doodle

Doodle · 2017-06-12 02:27:20

Hey N1KF,
I've been wanting to respond to your post, but did not want to from time to time because of finals-season with school. Now that's over, now is the time.
Here's my argument.

N1KF wrote:

Different parts of maturity may be easy to objectively define, but maturity as a whole appears to be a result of society telling adults what they should do. Maturity isn't inherently good, but the parts that make it up often are.

The essence of maturity is not only based on what society depicts of a person, as a cultural necessity, but maturity essentially is the development and capabilities of a person. Within this is responsibility, proper conduct, patience, self-control, and etc. Generally puttying it: being able to do things a child couldn't do or is not ready to do.
So my point is that maturity is inherently good because it is like a ripe fruit; a boy becoming a Man and a girl becoming a Woman: ready to handle life.

@Insanity

I agree with everything you've said except for one statement:

"This is the essence of maturity, being able to recognize the differences in how you perceive yourself as time goes on."

Being capable of seeing how you have changed over time is not the essence of maturity, its simply an observation of change. There can be a forty year old man who still complains like a baby. Recognizing development of your manhood or womanhood in terms of body is one side of maturity, in terms of intellect is another. Simply perceiving these changes whether mature or not does not define maturity.

HeyNK · 2017-06-12 02:40:10

I don't really care about defining maturity.

I just like to see that there is no better way to generate walls of text effort free than to bring up the subject of maturity. What a cool thing, huh?

Mood:

Abelysk · 2017-06-12 04:14:43

Maturity is the capability to handle "adult" experiences physically and mentally. Adults/teens that are labeled immature are insulted in a way that their mental capabilities are challenged.

Master1, Pingohits

Doodle · 2017-06-13 08:16:06

Abelysk wrote:

Maturity is the capability to handle "adult" experiences physically and mentally.

I took some time to think about this. I first thought it was true, but then i thought something was not quite right.

I disagree because,
maturity comes from their main places: life experiences, though disputed; God (referring to learned lessons; morality), and people mentoring and speaking into you.
To be mature is to have the ability to with stand hardships and trials in an area of life, and bring the right trait at the right time. Not necessarily handling "adult" stuff.

Could be explained more but i think i nailed it

What is maturity in the forum and game, I'd say its basic common sense: Don't be a troll, don't be a bully, and follow the rules.

Mieaz, Hans

Abelysk · 2017-06-13 16:39:02

That's an interesting opinion and could be argued to be relevant as well. A child that is taught maturity can act like an adult. Just look at wealthy families (especially those of royal descent) and the children of royal blood will likely behave in a mature manner. Good point, can't really argue there.

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#1 2017-05-24 14:48:26

Maturity

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