Do you think I could just leave this part blank and it'd be okay? We're just going to replace the whole thing with a header image anyway, right?
You are not logged in.
Alright, I've gotten a lot of requests for this, so I'm going to make it
Breathing may seem hard at first, but don't let that intimidate you! Everything comes with practice. Do you think I didn't pass out from lack of oxygen the first time I tried?
Alright, the trick to breathing is being in a good environment; mainly, somewhere with plenty of oxygen, you're going to have a hard time breath underwater, or in space.
Many people don't know this, but being at a lower elevation actually makes breathing easier! If you're at the top of Mt. everest it will be harder to breath than somewhere at sea level.
Another good piece of advice is to make sure your mouth is open, it's a rookie mistake I see often! People think you can breath with your mouth closed, but I advise you to use your mouth if you're a beginner.
Now I know you're thinking "Hey Alex! What about my nose?!" well now, you can breath out your nose, but that is an expert technique, which should be ignored for now.
It is a common misconception that putting your face right by a tree will help you breath, this isn't true, and if you smother your face into a tree, you may not be able to breath at all!
Alright, now for the step for step guide:
Things you will need: Lungs(preferably 2 of them), oxygen(lots).
Step 1
Make sure you are calm and ready to breath
Step 2
Open your mouth
Step 3
Inhale
Step 4
Wait 1-5 seconds
Step 5
Exhale.
Step 6
Repeat as needed.
Congratulations! You can breathe!
...
I can't think of a decent response expressing how win this is. I've had trouble breathing for a long time, and this guide has changed my life.
proc's discorb stylish themes for forums/the game
꧁꧂L O V E & C O R N꧁꧂ ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ
danke bluecloud thank u raphe [this section of my sig is dedicated to everything i've loved that's ever died]
?
Offline
This is bad and you should feel bad.
This is bad and you should feel bad.
Dude,this is suppose to be a joke.(I think)Wheres your sense of humor?
EDIT:Yes this guide is so useful!I can breathe like a pro now!xD
Last edited by Monstar43 (Mar 27 2011 3:40:52 pm)
This should be stickied for the fantastic easy-to-follow steps to being able to do such a, well, compulsory thing that plays an extremely important role in day-to-day life.
Looking forward to your next guide, keep it up Alex!
psshh... I breathe all the time. I've been breathing since I was born. That's right. SINCE I WAS BORN. I'm a natural breather. When I was a baby I was already so good at breathing that I decided I had enough air to CRY. You read it right, folks. So good at breathing, I could scream when I was a baby. My parents are so proud of me
"Sometimes failing a leap of faith is better than inching forward"
- ShinsukeIto
Offline
+rep for the comprehensive and step-by step guide. I think I'm ready to start using my nose, can you give us any tips for that?
I hate tall signatures.
Offline
+rep for the comprehensive and step-by step guide. I think I'm ready to start using my nose, can you give us any tips for that?
The best advice is to not try if you have a cold.
Like Totally Rob wrote:This is bad and you should feel bad.
Dude,this is suppose to be a joke.(I think)Wheres your sense of humor?
Pot calling the kettle black.
Uh... actually he DOES have a sense of humor, so forget your pots. You are a lone black pot. Everyone else is a rainbow cupcake. LEARN TO LAUGH! Maybe you should make a guide to growing a sense of humor. Remember that in order for your humor to grow strong you need to water it at least twice a day and make sure it has plenty of sunshine.
"Sometimes failing a leap of faith is better than inching forward"
- ShinsukeIto
Offline
Okay let me try this...
*opens mouth*
*inhales*
*waits 1-5 seconds*
OH NO! I FORGET WHAT TO DO NEXT!
*faints*
aka towwl
Offline
*pokes Bobithan*
Nope, he's out. Maybe we should get some paramedics or something over here.... Srsly, ppl, BREATHING IS EASY!I've been doing it for years. I can breath through my nose AND mouth at the same time (that right there takes talent) It's so easy, I can literally do it in my sleep!
Last edited by Different55 (Mar 27 2011 4:04:54 pm)
"Sometimes failing a leap of faith is better than inching forward"
- ShinsukeIto
Offline
Crap crap! CRAP! im stuck on step 5 help me D:
Quick, just exhale!
Offline
Alex, I think you forgot to mention that breathing is what lets you live...
I mourn for Kaosslasher, for I think he didn't exhale in time. A moment of silence please...
Last edited by SmittyW. (Mar 27 2011 5:19:59 pm)
Offline
Wait a minute. We need to breathe? Wow, never knew that. I thought it was optional. Well, I guess you learn something new everyday.
Obligatory piece of text placed here forcing you to load an extra 100 bytes of data per post I make.
Offline
Thanks guy, i forgot how to do it
Offline
OMG!!!! Thanks so much! This is exciting! Ok, stay calm. Check. Opening my mouth. Check. Inhale. Check. Wait for 5 seconds. Check. Yay, I breathed! 1bigsmile1 Wait, I feel dizzy. THERE WAS A FIF.... [Insert fainting here.]
Last edited by Raiden (Mar 27 2011 6:05:00 pm)
*wakes up*
Oh right, I needed to exhale.
Am I ready to use my nose?
aka towwl
Offline
Damn, i can't do it now
Offline
I think I got it now. For the first time in my life I went 10 minutes without passing out. Now if I can just get rid of this cold I can start to practice with my nose.
aka towwl
Offline
Keep practicing, Bobby, and someday you could become as good a breather as I am .
"Sometimes failing a leap of faith is better than inching forward"
- ShinsukeIto
Offline
Alex, do you do private lessons? I've almost got the hang of it. Also, my eyes are dry. Is there some sort of way to rapidly shut and open my eyes?
Offline
Yes, there is a technique that has been developed for millions of years. It is called "blinking." Funny name, huh?
"Sometimes failing a leap of faith is better than inching forward"
- ShinsukeIto
Offline
[ Started around 1732807910.9251 - Generated in 0.081 seconds, 12 queries executed - Memory usage: 1.62 MiB (Peak: 1.83 MiB) ]