Official Everybody Edits Forums

Zakleo

Guest

Favourite Jokes!

I think the best joke I know is...

I walked into a jewelers and said:
"Can I buy a watch?"
The guy at the counter replied:
"Analogue?"
And I replied:
"No just a watch please."

What's your favourite joke?

treejoe4

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Zakleo

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

Bumpedy bump

KanibalFrost

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

Chris fixed the game.

Zakleo

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

Bump. DX

Muffin

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

Why did the girl fall off the swing?
she had no arms

~Omri~

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

why cant newton ride a motorcycle in his backyard?
he is dead.

ILoveBacon

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

There were 3 boys, Shutup, Manners and Poop.
One day the three boys were playing football. The football was accidentally kicked down into a sewer. Poop went to search for it. A few minutes later the boys got tired of waiting for Poop so Manners went down to search for him while Shutup went to find a police officer. Shutup found a police officer.
"My friend went down into the sewers and hasn't come back up" Said Shutup.
"Ok, I will help search for him. What is your name?" Said the Police Officer.
"Shutup" Said Shutup.
"Excuse me!?" Said the Police Officer.
"Shutup. S-H-U-T-U-P." Said Shutup
"Where are your Manners young boy?" Said the Police Officer but Shutup misheard and said
"Down the sewers looking for Poop!"
There was this company. There boss was Jamacan (<--- Very important). He had 3 emploees at the same level, a Welsh man an English man and a Scotish man. He needed a job done but only one was needed. He got them together and told them all about the job he needed done. He said
"To coose the right person for the job you must all make me a bacon sandwich"
The Welsh man was first. He opened the fridge and got the bacon and butter. Took some bread from the bread bin. Cooked the bacon. Made a bacon sandwich. He gave it too the boss and he said
"MMMM... Its very nice!"
The English dude was next. He opened the fridge and got the bacon and butter. Took some bread from the bread bin. Cooked the bacon. Made a bacon sandwich. He gave it too the boss and he said
"fairly nice..."
Finnaly, it was the Scotish man's turn. He opened the fridge. There was no bacon or butter left. Instead, he got a can of beer. Got bread from the bread bin. He also got a mallet and smashed the can of beer. He then put it in his sandwich and the boss said
"What is this mon! You put a beer can in my sandwich mon!" So the Scottish man replied
"I thought you asked for a beer can sandwich!"

Zakleo

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

Bumpedy bump bump. Bump BUMP!

Tachyonic

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

[minimod]
zakleo, please stop bumping so much. Sometimes it takes time to gain a new post.
Could atleast wait a full day until you bump.
[/minimod]
[ontopic]
Why did the chicken cross the road?
*drumroll*
How the hell am I supposed to know? I'm staring at a computer screen, not a zebra crossing!
*budum tss*
[/ontopic]

Last edited by Tachyonic (May 13 2012 5:10:12 pm)

ChaosDemon

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

Why didn't the pirates see the movie?

because just as they entered the theater a car filled with ninjas drove by and the ninjas killed the pirates.

Manmamario

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

1) Why did the teacher wear the sunglasses in his/her classroom?

Answer: Because she/he had a bright students

2) Why did the chicken cross the "right" road and not "left" road?

Answer: Because there was a KFC on the left road

3) Why was the math workbook sad?

Answer: Because it had too many problem.
I'm sorry if these were boring >_<

killingpepper123

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

...wat?

terrorism, you know?

Ka-Boom the building goes down before the 3 musulmans cuz they placed a bomb on it HHHEEELLLOO?

.... Want a class of Logic 101?

Okay, **** is a musulmans?
Also, your phrasing of the joke was pathetic, thus me typing "...wat?"
As well as this, there appears to be no differences between the "musulman"s so the joke has no real trick (/or Red Herring) to it - and even then, you don't describe the "musulman"s in any way, shape or form so we have no idea who they are. Also, "musulman"s aren't objects, they're people (Unless you make them out to be objects). It should be "Who falls first?", not "What falls first?".
By the way, your grammar sucks.

Looks like the Teacher needs refreshing on what he's learnt.

..........you are right..... I'll delete this UGLY joke........sorry.......

ILoveBacon

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

What did the cookie say when crossing the road?
*Drumroll*
"Crumbs!"
Badum tush!

OrangeCrix

Member

Joined: 2015-03-01

Posts: 266

Re: Favourite Jokes!

I would say women's rights but I have a better one...

Two guys walk into a bar.
The first guy said "I'll have H20." Then he walks away
The second guy sid "I'll have H20 too." He died

Zakleo

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

None of theese are funny <.<

ILoveBacon

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

Do this at home joke

Say I'm a man after everything I post.
I went to a pub last night.
I met a girl last night.
I took her home.
I slept with her.
In the morning she said

N1KF

Wiki Mod

From: ဪဪဪဪဪ From: ဪဪဪဪဪ From: ဪဪဪဪဪ

Joined: 2015-02-15

Posts: 11,158

Website

Re: Favourite Jokes!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Answer:..............................................................TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!!!1!!!1!1111one!!!one!!eleven!!one-hundred!1!

Zakleo

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

You guys suck

killingpepper123

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

I have another one!

What is worst than swinging a baby around?

...stoping it with a shovel!
ba-dum, tisch!

Michal

Member

Joined: 2017-07-04

Posts: 283

Re: Favourite Jokes!

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants smex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!"

GKAbyss

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

"Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! ... Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!"   Sorry I don't have a translation for it, most of the words are nonsense, so there isn't a point translating it, as half of it would still not be english.

Krazyman50

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

My favorite joke.

"Why did the zakleo make a favorite topic?"
"I don't know, why?"
"Because he knows it annoys us and thinks it makes him famous for starting other ones to happen!"

It's funny because it's true.

coolmanman

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

This one is horrible...
What is worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree?
1 baby nailed to 10 trees.
I hope no one laughed

Muffin

Guest

Re: Favourite Jokes!

A blonde and a brunette jump off a cliff. Who hits the bottom first?

The brunette. The blonde has to stop and ask for direction.